IUC Exclusive: Another One Bites the Dust. Phoenix’s act is phony in more ways than one
The media and the public have been obsessing in recent weeks over the bizarre and entertaining antics of Joaquin Phoenix, whose announcement that he is quitting movies to begin a hip hop career is, of course, a giant stunt concocted by Phoenix and his brother-in-law, Casey Affleck, for their forthcomingmockumentary. That much is already common knowledge in Hollywood and beyond.
But IUC has learned from sources close to the brilliant rising actor that his Andy Kaufman-like escapades are in fact part of a larger strategy designed to inoculate him from the potential fallout of his imminent decision to come clean about his sexuality.
After they finally reveal that the whole hip hop/David Letterman meltdown thing was a hoax, Phoenix will resume his career where he left off.
But a source close to Affleck reveals that his new edgy image will help Phoenix make the transition from a sex symbol (which requires a public heterosexual facade) to character-driven roles where his sexuality won’t matter. Does that mean the hotties he dated such as Anna Friel, Liv Tyler and a host of other starlets were merely beards? Not necessarily. Like many closeted Hollywood actors, it’s entirely possible that Phoenix is actually bisexual, which always complicates the guessing game. I’ll reserve judgment until I see him walking down a red carpet with the female Stedman, Penelope Cruz, on his arm, usually a surefire tip-off.
Look for Phoenix to become the first Oscar-nominated actor in Hollywood history to come out of the celluloid closet unless, like his buddy Jake “Toothy Tile” Gyllenhaal, his handlers convince him that such a move will be career suicide.
Which begs the question: Has Phoenix ever got Toothy? I’m told there was a fling back in 2006 but I’m still trying to track down those details.
Developing!
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Casey Affleck is not Joaquin’s brother in law, check your facts next time you post your fan fic. This is old news, it was already reported by his people that this was a hoax and that Phoenix and Afleck were filming a mock documentary. Phoenix is not coming out the closet and there are no facts to track down from 2006 because there is nothing to track down even though most think your buddie Ted awas talking about Phoenix in his fake BI, Crisp lisp, the last time Ted posted about him was 2006.
Ted must have told you to post about TT and closeted actors to get hits, your posts make no sense, they are nothing but re-hashed crap from other blogs and supermarket rags.
Replycorrection: He is married to Phoenix’s sister, but my comments about you being full of shit will remain. You know that none of these actor’s people will come after you so you are safe, just keep the hits oming with your crappy fan fic with no facts to back them up.
ReplyHilarious! Nothing like an ignorant fool ranting that someone needs to check his facts before he has in fact checked his own! Brilliant – keep it up!
ReplyHi Keane! Drinking the Ian kool-aid??? Ian always drops a tidbit and then says that he has to check the facts, shouldn’t it be the other way around??
I find Ian a bit homophobic, he thinks by outing everyone dead or alive will increase hits on his sad little blog because it’s so shocking that they are all gay!!! Stop clutching your pearls Ian and do some real investigation and stop recycling lame and dusty old gossip.
And Keane you need a new hobby, or maybe go out and get some fresh air.
ReplyOut me Ian you big stud!!!!!
ReplyYes love, you are obviously way too good and have far too much in your life to be posting on an internet gossip site, and yet strangely here you are posting on an internet gossip site, again and again, and not bothering to use the tool known as “google” first either!!! Can you see the problem there? If you’re so much better than Ian and myself the best way of demonstrating it is to fuck off!
ReplyI’m hoping the Phoenix act on Letterman is a hoax. He is wacky no question about it but a WONDERFUL actor. I believe Joaquin was Ted’s Crisp Lisp. Other than the late Heath, my favorite actor of the younger generation (20s to early 30s) is Joaquin Phoenix. But seeing his antics the last few weeks was making me think he was having a meltdown and was heading toward Heath’s sad fate. I’m hoping your sources are correct about this. I would HATE HATE to see him become another tragic statistic like Heath.
FYI, I never heard anything about Joaquin and Jake. Never. HOWEVER, Joaquin and Heath were very fond of one another and had been photographed chatting/schmoozing during Award season 2005-2006. Also, several months before he died, Heath was photographed talking to pal Joaquin in downtown NY when Joaquin was filming “Two Lovers.”
Ian, are you sure it’s not Joaquin? I know Heath was basically straight but I believe he dabbled and he seemed to really like Joaquin and vice versa.
ReplyJoaquin is just awesome, I really hope he succeeds with whatever it is he is planning!
Ian, I don’t know if you take wishes, but there is one old blind item (from Entertainment Lawyer, around 2006, I guess) that’s still just driving me nuts. It is the one about a succesful female “singer” who had someone else sing for her in her albums. A Milli Vanilli type of story. That blind item may be just a complete hoax or exaggeration, but if you know the truth, please reveal it to us.
ReplyIan, do you have anything on Clooney? Now I did hear about a flirtation between him and Toothy (speaking of Toothy). Also, I heard a story that Toothy once spent a night in Clooney’s LA home.
ReplyOK that’s just disgusting. If he is gay why does he have to be. I don’t think of him as a sex symbol. He’s still riding on River’s coattails in my opinion. As a fag i just don’t want him batting for our team. It’s like being told Liberace is gay. I shiver the thought. I don’t get that Ian is homophobic. I think he thinks he doing the LGBT community a service. When he’s sucking c*ck or being anally intruded by a guy on film is when I’ll believe it. My only requirement for proof is video of people in flagrante, because there is always Photo shop. But it’s fun to speculate,
ReplyIs he really considered a sex symbol? I wouldn’t even describe him as plain(like jake) he’s out and out ugly! I don’t think many hearts would be broken if he came out. Don’t think the gay community would be whooping with joy either.
ReplyOh, I remember watching the 2006 Oscars and that Phoenix and Jake were walking together at some point and I later read that they were spending time together that night but I don’t know if either of them had actual dates. Does anybody remember? I didn’t get the impression that they were romantically together, but I thought they were pals when I saw them together at that event.
ReplyJanet – I’m pretty sure the answer to that BI is Britney. I’ve heard that its a black woman who does a lot of the singing on her record and she just does a lot of the heavy breathing etc! So the princess of pop not only doesn’t sing live, she doesn’t even sing on her records and seems to have forgotten how to dance since her “breakdown” to boot! All she does is show up and take up breathing space. She’s the epitome of the empty pop signifier to me.
ReplyA sex symbol, LOL oh NO did some stupid publicist tell him that he is a sex symbol. Jeez, come on, did anyone ever think of Johnny Cash as a sex symbol? This guy is delusional. I have to believe his is putting this out there hoping some studio heads will think, “oh yeah, he could be a sex symbol if we just clean him up a bit, yeah, he could be the next big thing” Ian go tell his friends, HIS IS ALREADY A CHARACTER ACTOR! lmao Now his little brother, he could have been a sex symbol.
ReplyMememe – he seems completely fucked up but he’s a well-respected actor, we wouldn’t be crying into our pillows either. Who have we had lately: Lindsay, Britney, Paris, all the skanks! Give us someone who doens’t wear a minskirt and no knickers on a night out and we’re made up!
ReplyKate – I dunno I think some people find him quite sexy in a brooding, dark kind of way. He looked quite hot in Buffalo Soldiers (was that its name?), but then what would I know, I’m a lesbian!
Reply@Keane: I’ve considered Britney too, but I think she sang live even early on in her pop career (and before it too) and hasn’t been afraid to make mistakes live, so I doupt it’s her. Same with Madonna. Seems like no female singer fits, so I’ve started to consider guys like Enrique Inglesias as well.
ReplyPhoenix was seen hanging with Heath Ledger on Oscar night, not Jake. It seems that Chris and Ian got their BBM actors mixed up! There are actully pics of Joaquin and Heath on that nignt, none of Jake and either of them.
Never heard any gay rumors about Phoenix, period.
ReplyLOL no Keane, he is no sex symbol, not in the world I am in, and I live in LA. I don’t any woman that thinks he is. He is a slob. Out of shape, far from it. He is no Johnny Depp, who by the way some freaks on the internet claimed killed his little brother, shot him in the head in the desert and are avenging revenge. Weird huh? Yeah, they say their DNA did not match, bunch of whacked out people .
ReplyTo be honest I am not a gossip believer, BUT i have to admit you re fun to read and for sure one of the best in the Gossip world!
ReplyThanks for that !
@Clooney’s Closet:
ReplyWell, of course he would have been seen with Heath that night for obvious reasons but that would not have struck me at all odd because they did the movie together. I specifically remember River Phoenix and Jake being photographed together. I’m 100% sure of that.
@Lindalee:
ReplySorry, of course I meant Joaquin Phoenix
My previous post didn’t post for some reason but I too remember Joaquin and Jake together maybe in the pre-Oscar red carpet show and thinking is that his date? If he had been with Heath, the thought would not have crossed my mind. So I concur they were definitely together that night.
Here’s a Myspace post from somebody who attended the Oscar ceremony and “passed through security along with Jake Gyllenhaal and Joaquin Phoenix.”
http://blogs.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.view&friendID=43226386&blogID=97078596
Reply@ Kate – yeah I think he may be more popular in the UK, we like um a bit more rough, fucked up and edgy here. I mean, millions of girls idolise Pete Docherty for fuck’s sake – I rest my case!
ReplyI remember the Red carpet thing in ‘06. Don’t remember Joaquin but I do remember Jake, he was solo. I remember because he was almost the next to last actor to be interviewed. If I remember, Phoenix took his mother and sister to the oscars. Jake was sitting to what looked like sme PA, a blonde. In that same row was a brunette chick and his pal Chris Fischer the chef. If he went with anyone it was him. I saw pics of Jake and Peter Saasgaard, Maggies fiance, Jake and Matt Dillion and ironiclly Ryan Phillipe.
There was a group pic of Jake, Clooney, Hoffman, Heath and Joaquin, perhaps that’s what you are referring to becasue I don’t remember those 2 together. That MySpace sighting means that they passed through security, don’t give lazy Ian another excuse to pimp this BS.
Replywasn’t his brother River bi?
Replymookie – I thought River was plain gay. My friend said him and Keanu were together at one point (the filming of My Own Private Idaho I assume). It was slightly before my time though, I was still young and innocent then!
Reply@Keane:
Keanu Reeves is NOT gay, you moron. He’s currently in a discreet relationship with Parker Posey. Oh but of course you’ll tell me he’s secretly married to mogul David Geffen!
ReplyHi Ludivine, thanks for the compliment babe but its you that’s the moron – please see my trashing of your arrogant and nonsensical bullshit arguments about gay politics and rights which you know zero about. If you had the brains that you were born with and were capable of reading you would see that I didn’t say that I thought Keanu was gay, I said that’s what a friend told me but I didn’t know myself because the film and his major popularity was before my time. And Keanu Reeves is actually a friend of friend of mine – her husband acted in a blockbuster film with him – so if I cared enough about his sexuality I could find out. I don’t care so I’ve never asked. So stick that up your overly tight anal orifice and fucking smoke it. Love ya!
Reply@Keane:
Ha, sorry for the uncontrolled rant. I’m afraid I’m a bit too touchy about Keanu.
ReplyFair enough, apology accepted!
Reply