IUC Exclusive: Gay Scandal Plagues Locker room of NFL’s New England Patriots
As if the New England Patriots don’t have enough problems with their star player Tom Brady being out with injury for the full season. The Patriots are always big winners on the field. Off the field, a controversy has develped that has never before been revealed to the public. Teammates of a star defensive player have become wary walking around naked or taking showers with him cause they recently found out his most intimate secret – he has a boyfriend. “Many players on the team are in shock over it,” a team source told IUC. “Noone wants to shower around him cause they’re worried he might inspect their private parts. It has become a very uncomfortable situation for everyone from the players to the coaches to the wives of the players.”
Homophobic attitudes are rampant in professional sports. Recently an NHL player almost lost his job cause his teammates thought swung both ways, a pro golfer got death threats and a former champion boxer quit the sport entirely cause he was being harrassed for being gay. According to sports sociologist Abe Goldman at least one in every 11 pro athletes is gay. DEVELOPING…
- 7 Comments
- Tags: New England Patriots, NFL, Professional sport
Lol…is it verebal the mlb or the ss i forget what his name is…those are the only stars on the team i know of…or does ty law still play.And then theres seymour.Lol.i think hes offense though.Hell i dont know.Im a girl but i know a little bit about football.Its funny how everybody is supposdedly so uncomfortable about it esspecially the wives…what??Scared your husband is going to turn into a fudgepacker???Silly….but funny.
ReplyCome on people is it really a surprise that pretty fucking pretty, pretty-boy Tom Brady is gay? If you ask me, there are three shocking facts about the above story 1) that a mere 1 in 11 pro sports players is gay and 2) that it hasn’t come out sooner 30 that Mr. Brady will never bed me.
What do guys do in pro sports when they are not playing? They shower together, pour booze all over each other, slap each other’s asses, and occasionally grab each other’s balls for kicks.
But football is even more overtly gay. Big bears in cock-head helmets run up and down a field until they find someone weak enough to tackle. Who needs the clandestine life of glory wholes and nighttime cruising when the sports world has neatly laid out 100 yards of free, gay space? And has anyone ever considered the names of the positions: Wide Receiver (small dicks go home), tight end (closeted gay), Fullback (only willing to give), running back (won’t sleep over), tailback (only willing to receive), Quarterback (Tom Brady).
Replythat’s glory holes not glory wholes, I do have some pride.
ReplyQuit picking on Tom Brady! Next thing you’ll do is tell me that Troy Aikman is gay!
You bastard!
No. Seriously. Your not trying to suggest that the German Supermodel is a beardette, are you?
ReplyAre we seriously threatening people’s lives because he/any teammate on the Patriots may be gay?!? Wow, that is crazy disappointing BUT what is even more upsetting is that Tom “poor pinky-toe” Brady seems to only be getting exposure and press for the bigger of the two extremities.
ReplyI’m really beginning to think maybe you should finally be outed Ian. For someone who makes a lot of smoke, it is time someone put you to the fire. My suspicion is you like transgendered prostitutes who go on 4th and short. Just because the Pats suck this year doesn’t make them all Gay, just former pat CG Randall…
ReplySpeaking of Bill Clinton:
It is opined that Bill Clinton committed racist hate crimes, and I am not free to say anything further about it.
Respectfully Submitted by Andrew Y. Wang, J.D. Candidate
B.S., Summa Cum Laude, 1996
Messiah College, Grantham, PA
Lower Merion High School, Ardmore, PA, 1993
(I can type 90 words per minute, and there are probably thousands of copies on the Internet indicating the content of this post. Moreover, there are innumerable copies in very many countries around the world.)
Reply_________________
“If only it were possible to ban invention that bottled up memories so they never got stale and faded.” Off the top of my head—it came from my Lower Merion High School yearbook.